I was talking to a friend tonight, about how some people had said something to another group of people, and had hurt their feelings. As I discussed this, I realized that the "victims" were actually the ones harboring the anger. I realized that I really need to get better about letting things go. The problem is, this situation really doesn't involve me, but because both sides talked to me, I can't let it go. They have probably forgotten the conversation, and I am the one who is letting it bug me, and am worrying about it. And why?
Sometimes I feel like I just need a good cleansing. I have two times of the year where I go through this process. Usually on my birthday (because that's when I make my resolutions for the new year) and for New Years, along with everyone else. I'm starting a health cleanse on Monday, and I almost feel like I need a spiritual/emotional cleanse to go along with it. Get rid of the toxins in my life. Say my apologies, and focus on the relationships that are encouraging, rather than discouraging.
I cleansed myself of one mental toxin yesterday, and I feel much better about it. The thing is, is that if the friendship is not healthy, it is not good for either person. So, why try to force something that is not there? I'm not sure if I need to take action or not. Honestly, I think I am probably over reacting, but it is always good to sit back, type out my thoughts, and think about the good and bad of situations. And tonight, I realized that I just need to let stuff go. And I need to focus on that fresh start.
Tomorrow is a brand new day!
But, boy am I excited for Monday!
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Musicals and memories
Sometimes I wish my life was a musical. I think I can find a bit of my story in every musical I see. Today's message is brought to you by Les Miserables. As I watched/listened to "on my own," I thought about how much I could relate.
I'm really good at the one sided relationships, and I felt her pain.
I feel like today has been a "look at all of your relationships" kind of day.
I went to zoo lights tonight with one of my good friends. We calculated that we have been holding this tradition for 14 years. We go to the old spaghetti factory then head to zoo lights to drink hot cocoa and ride the train. Tonight, that's really what we did, we went straight for the train line, and as we waited our hour and a half, we talked about everything past and present. How it was two years ago that she had just started dating this guy, and last year was experiencing her first year of marriage. Tonight I shared all of my horrible dating stories (which I feel like I've been sharing a lot lately, and always end with the other person saying "I'm so glad I'm not in the dating world anymore." Thanks.)
And we talked about what could happen in the coming years, and how our lives will be changing with dating, marriage, and eventually kids. It was really great to share this time with her, and to talk life, love, and faith. I can always open up to her in a way that I don't with very many people. I love our tradition. It may come only once a year, but it is a good few hours of quality time, and always encouraging.
So, what did I leave with?
I'm on my own. But amazingly, I'm really okay with that right now! I've turned a corner, and am in a new place, and I love the road that is ahead. A road of mystery, of excitement, and of course...two months in Africa! Who knows what will happen within this next year, and where I will be for zoo lights 2013? The world is my oyster!
I'm really good at the one sided relationships, and I felt her pain.
I feel like today has been a "look at all of your relationships" kind of day.
I went to zoo lights tonight with one of my good friends. We calculated that we have been holding this tradition for 14 years. We go to the old spaghetti factory then head to zoo lights to drink hot cocoa and ride the train. Tonight, that's really what we did, we went straight for the train line, and as we waited our hour and a half, we talked about everything past and present. How it was two years ago that she had just started dating this guy, and last year was experiencing her first year of marriage. Tonight I shared all of my horrible dating stories (which I feel like I've been sharing a lot lately, and always end with the other person saying "I'm so glad I'm not in the dating world anymore." Thanks.)
And we talked about what could happen in the coming years, and how our lives will be changing with dating, marriage, and eventually kids. It was really great to share this time with her, and to talk life, love, and faith. I can always open up to her in a way that I don't with very many people. I love our tradition. It may come only once a year, but it is a good few hours of quality time, and always encouraging.
So, what did I leave with?
I'm on my own. But amazingly, I'm really okay with that right now! I've turned a corner, and am in a new place, and I love the road that is ahead. A road of mystery, of excitement, and of course...two months in Africa! Who knows what will happen within this next year, and where I will be for zoo lights 2013? The world is my oyster!
Monday, October 8, 2012
Who AM I?
I ran my first marathon yesterday! What the heck? WHO AM I?!?!
I never thought I would be the girl to run a marathon! I'm the girl who takes naps! I love TV! I have an addiction to cookies! I might be able to work out on the eliptical for 30 minutes, but that's pushing it! I am NOT a runner!!!
And yet, in the last year, I have run/walked/walka-jogged 3 half marathons, the hood to coast, numerous 5k's, a few 10k's, and a full marathon! WHAT THE HECK!?!? Seriously, all of this started on October 9 of 2011, so that's all in less than a year.
Who am I?
Well, I'm still figuring that out! I just know, I'm not done living yet! There is too much to experience! Who knows what I will do next?
But this just goes to show me, that we can do anything! There are no limits! For how much I have accomplished in my life, I feel like I haven't even started yet. There is so much more to do, so much life to live!
So what's left on the list? Well, honestly it doesn't matter, because none of this was ever on my list, so throw that list out the window and just live!
Also, I find it interesting that I keep talking about this as my "first" marathon! I already want to do another one, just so that I can see if I can get a better time. The funny thing is, I could care less about my time! I hate when people ask about my time, because it's not about the time, but about the journey. I just know that I can do better on that journey.
Good thing I'll be out of country next year, so that I don't have to think about it yet!
And the song in my head today?
Ryan Shuppe and the Rubberband, "Dream Big"
This picture is from around mile 19, where my family came to cheer me on! I saw my mom and nephew down the road, and ran over to them, and they ran a ways with me, then I stopped to give hugs, celebrate, and of course...take some Ibuprophen! My sister realized that she forgot to take a picture, so I had to "take a loop" so that's why I look kind of funny, but I had been running when I saw them, and that felt good! Plus, I was almost done...hence the smile! Ibuprophen, and a short 10k left. Life was good! And...Life IS good!
Okay, I guess I'm not done talking about this yet, because there is still more I want to mention.
I am so blessed! Not only did my family come out and cheer me on, but they brought our "extended" family (an old student of mine and her mother) with them! Then, at mile 25, when I was so focused on seeing the mile mark, I didn't even realize that the people standing in front of the sign were my friends! My friends came out to cheer me on!!! How awesome is that?!?!
Then, to top off the night, my friends came over (another group) and celebrated with me! We drank champagne, ate pizza and guacamole, and just talked about life, the marathon, and Africa fundraising. I am SOOOOOO blessed!!! I'm such a lucky girl!
And quite thankful!
I never thought I would be the girl to run a marathon! I'm the girl who takes naps! I love TV! I have an addiction to cookies! I might be able to work out on the eliptical for 30 minutes, but that's pushing it! I am NOT a runner!!!
And yet, in the last year, I have run/walked/walka-jogged 3 half marathons, the hood to coast, numerous 5k's, a few 10k's, and a full marathon! WHAT THE HECK!?!? Seriously, all of this started on October 9 of 2011, so that's all in less than a year.
Who am I?
Well, I'm still figuring that out! I just know, I'm not done living yet! There is too much to experience! Who knows what I will do next?
But this just goes to show me, that we can do anything! There are no limits! For how much I have accomplished in my life, I feel like I haven't even started yet. There is so much more to do, so much life to live!
So what's left on the list? Well, honestly it doesn't matter, because none of this was ever on my list, so throw that list out the window and just live!
Also, I find it interesting that I keep talking about this as my "first" marathon! I already want to do another one, just so that I can see if I can get a better time. The funny thing is, I could care less about my time! I hate when people ask about my time, because it's not about the time, but about the journey. I just know that I can do better on that journey.
Good thing I'll be out of country next year, so that I don't have to think about it yet!
And the song in my head today?
Ryan Shuppe and the Rubberband, "Dream Big"
Okay, I guess I'm not done talking about this yet, because there is still more I want to mention.
I am so blessed! Not only did my family come out and cheer me on, but they brought our "extended" family (an old student of mine and her mother) with them! Then, at mile 25, when I was so focused on seeing the mile mark, I didn't even realize that the people standing in front of the sign were my friends! My friends came out to cheer me on!!! How awesome is that?!?!
Then, to top off the night, my friends came over (another group) and celebrated with me! We drank champagne, ate pizza and guacamole, and just talked about life, the marathon, and Africa fundraising. I am SOOOOOO blessed!!! I'm such a lucky girl!
And quite thankful!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Africa
Well, the news is out! Or it will be by this time tomorrow at least!
The secret that I have been holding on to for over a month now, is that I will be taking 2 months in the fall of 2013 to go to Africa and do mission work.
I am so incredibly excited!
I will be telling the youth tomorrow night, but just told our session tonight. I was (and still am) overwhelmed by their support! Not only are they letting me go, knowing that I will be returning to a job, but they want to support me on the journey as well. They want to send me as a part of the church, meaning that they want to be involved. I just can't believe it! I never expected that. I almost began to cry. Nerves kind of took over me as I told them the news, and it was a little embarrassing as it was a "shaky voice" moment, on a day that I have little voice. But they were ecstatic! Maybe even as excited as I am!
Now I take the next step.
I am praying that God will show me where He wants me to go. This is a big faith journey, and I'm just stepping out, praying that God leads the way. Looking back on the last few months, I can see how He's been putting this all together, so I know that wherever I end up, it will be His plan, and His guidance leading me there.
I'm a bit tired and flaky from all of my cold meds, so I'm going to leave it at that. But I will tell the rest of the story soon!
The secret that I have been holding on to for over a month now, is that I will be taking 2 months in the fall of 2013 to go to Africa and do mission work.
I am so incredibly excited!
I will be telling the youth tomorrow night, but just told our session tonight. I was (and still am) overwhelmed by their support! Not only are they letting me go, knowing that I will be returning to a job, but they want to support me on the journey as well. They want to send me as a part of the church, meaning that they want to be involved. I just can't believe it! I never expected that. I almost began to cry. Nerves kind of took over me as I told them the news, and it was a little embarrassing as it was a "shaky voice" moment, on a day that I have little voice. But they were ecstatic! Maybe even as excited as I am!
Now I take the next step.
I am praying that God will show me where He wants me to go. This is a big faith journey, and I'm just stepping out, praying that God leads the way. Looking back on the last few months, I can see how He's been putting this all together, so I know that wherever I end up, it will be His plan, and His guidance leading me there.
I'm a bit tired and flaky from all of my cold meds, so I'm going to leave it at that. But I will tell the rest of the story soon!
Monday, April 9, 2012
God speaks at Zumba
Tonight I went to Zumba for the second time. Our church is hosting a class on Mondays. I had to laugh, because as I reflect on this week, and how God has been moving in my life, I realized that it all started last week at Zumba! It was a song that came on and opened my eyes, and was just like..."THAT'S IT!!!" It was my AHA! moment at church Zumba! And now, the ball is rolling!
I still can't post what's happening, but I hope to be able to say something in the next few weeks. But I am excited about what God is doing, and the doors that are opening!
Please pray for me as I take this exciting journey!
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
EXCITEMENT
Something big is happening, and unfortunately, I can't write about what it is yet. And worse off, I can't find my journal. But God is opening doors, and speaking to me in ways unexpected. Just to go ahead and ward off any rumors, no, I am not leaving my job. But I am serving with a new excitement, and a boost in life! And to ward off other rumors, no it does not mean that I'm dating or getting married!
That said, I think those are all of the rumors that people would jump to!
But all of the confusion that I have been feeling for the last few months is finally clearing up! Doors are opening, and I'm excited to see where God leads!
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